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Everybody's sad and dreamy - But here in my heart, I give you the best of my love.

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December 22nd, 2006


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08:10 am - Everybody's sad and dreamy
So I got home last night and I picked up the mail. I'm leafing through it, as per usual, on the way up the stairs. 3 cards today. The cards have been flooding in. Holiday cards. Sympathy cards, you name it. I myself have only sent one card. A thank you card to Sissy's grandmother. I didn't even want to do the holiday card thing, although the outpouring of cards actually has me reconsidering....


Anyway, the cards. One is from from Greg and Maya, easily recognizable by the postmark. One is from Medford, MA from someone who's name I don't recognize. The other is from Peabody, again, from a name I don't recognize. I tell hoppie, I don't know these people.
He said, Read me the names.
I read the names and the locations.
He just gives me this baffled look.
The funny thing to me is that he thought he'd recognize the names when I didn't. Like I don't know all his friends. 8-)

I open the cards. Greg and Maya's first. As expected, it's a holiday card. Maya has added a lovely note offering their support, which I already knew I had, but it's nice to be reminded. 8-)

Then the Medford card. It's a sympathy card from a friend of Maya's. It includes a poem of hope and renewal and a wish for better times. I tear up. It's very sweet that a total stranger has taken a sympathetic interest in my pain.

Then the Peabody card. It's a thank you card. From the receptionist at my dentists office. And there's a story here:

At the April appointment, I was finishing up a bracelet for my sister-in-law's birthday. I brought it with me, figuring I might have some time to work on it while hoppie was being worked on. I showed it to the dental hygienist and she asked for something similiar. I took her measurements and colour preferences and made her one which I brought with me to my most recent appointment.

The morning of the appointment, I was thinking that being so close to Christmas, it would probably be dead tacky to give the dental hygienist a gift without bringing something for the receptionist 'cause we do spend an awful lot of time talking to her, and she always remembers us and asks about the family. So I looked through my supply of assembled jewellery and found a set of Christmas dragonflies that I made last year as a sample. I had a commission for a pair of Christmas dragonflies, so I made a few different colour combinations and let the guy who wanted them pick the ones he thought his gf would like best. This is one of the ones he didn't choose.

Anyway, I packaged it up all nice and pretty and brought it with us. She was busy when it was time for us to leave, so I left the earring package on her desk and promptly forgot about it.

Until last night when her thank you card arrived. It was obviously a personal message, so I won't quote it, but the gist of it was that she's been going through a rough time and feeling very down and the earrings meant something to her. They meant someone was thinking about her and caring about her. And they helped.

To receive this at a time when I feel like utterly rubbish and completely useless is incalculable. I'm not saying I've turned any kind of corner or that I've past my lowest point, but maybe there is something to this giving season.

I read something this weekend, and I can't remember where, that generous people always feel like they're not doing enough. And I thought, "Hey! I don't do enough for other people!" And then I thought, "What a double-edged sword that is? I mean, just because you feel like you don't do enough for other people, it doesn't mean axiomatically that you do enough for other people." But it does mean that I want to do more.

It's enough for now to just be in the game. Being an all-star will come later.

Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
Current Music: Samantha Fox - (Hurt Me! Hurt Me!) But The Pants Stay On

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