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May 24th, 2004
 | 11:16 pm - This way to the abyss
I think there's a special level of hell designed for those people who cause discomfort and misery to others. I don't mean on a small scale, like MLH, I mean, large scale, long-term agony.
Like, the 9/11 bombers not only disrupted the lives of hundreds or thousands of people, but they will continue to have long-term effects on the travel industry in the forms of longer lines, higher prices, and enhanced paranoia. I'm not trying to mock or in any way trivialize what they did to individual families, but I think in addition to a hell for scum-sucking murderers, they should receive extra punishment for making everyone miserable. For each pair of shoes that has to be taken off, another torture should commence.
This thought comes about because I hate tablets. When I was a kid, we had something that apparently my children will never see, it was a fabulous oblong medicine dispenser known as a capsule. (Yes, I know they still have them for some meds. My migrane meds are a capsule...that's hardly the point!) They dissolved quickly and were easy to swallow even without water (although some people still like thier water.) Then when I was in middle school, I think, some assmunch decided it would be fun to put poison in the Tylenol capules. Well, after a few people died and the uproar died down, Bristol Myers decided, maybe they wouldn't make capsules anymore. Instead they developed this new thing called a "caplet." It was like a pill, but slightly better shaped. I hate pills!!!! HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE them! I liked capsules. So to you, Tylenol poisoning assmunch. I have a special level in hell with your name on it.
We'll add some frivolous lawsuit types who drive up the prices on food and commodities because they either a) lack common sense or b) lack morals or c) lack money and want to bleed it out of the rest of us by suing corporations.
I feel like I should throw the Mass Turnpike Authority in to my level of hell because the tolls keep going up even though all of the work they were formed to do was completed ages ago. Now they're selling bonds and creating debt to keep themselves self-perpetuating. Thank you, please step into hell. Line forms to the left, don't forget to pay your toll, now doubling hourly.
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Really? That works? I have a mortal and pestal....Although I suppose the ever-lovin' husband would probably prefer I reserve it for things like mustard seed and garlic over excedrin by the mass ton. I've considered powering it and drinking it before, but I hate the taste. I've always assumed too, that it would be just as difficult on the stomach in powdered form as it in in pill form. I take it with food, but I find that's restrictive. I don't think chocolate is quite enough, although, I suppose if I had enough chocolate....I'd probably feel sick for other reasons.
Somedays you just can't win,
-m
I could skip the pills entirely and go with bourbon shots. Nah, I do okay with the caplets, but I realized after buying a bottle of tablets accidentally, I don't want to take them anymore. I don't even want to pretend I don't hate them.
-m You know if you hate them so badly, try stuffing them (the tablets) into the capsules you get at the health food store. They come in sizes so you could find some big enough to hide your pills. Does that work? |
