awesome ultimate expert hen (mdyesowitch) wrote,
awesome ultimate expert hen

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Contract Negotiations

solies: So why haven't you yelled at me yet?
Me: About what? What did you do?
Solies: Me? Oh, nothing. (starts to back away.)
Me: Oh, I see. You're wondering why I haven't yelled about you not posting this weekend, despite the fact that I saw you online Saturday night and know you were well capable of geniune solies magic.
Solies: ...
Me: Well, I've thought about it, and I realize my expecatations aren't entirely reasonable. I mean you work hard, you expend a lot of creative energy to keep me happy, and I think it's right and reasonable that you be permitted one weekend off a month.
Solies: Wow, that's jolly decent of you.
Me: Thank you. Of course, any additional slack time will have to come out of your pay...
Solies: Well, that's only fai...hey! I don't get paid...
Me: So you can easily imagine the financial impact of getting paid even less, can't you? Don't you have a car to keep running? Those expensive petrol bills. You can't afford to slack off, my friend. Wayne is watching. Now, back to work before I summon my mountain lions. They're getting quite good with their tasers.
Solies: Yip.
Tags: soliefriends

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