Solies: I see from your blog that the tart that I just consumed is composed entirely of bourbon.
Emma: Not entirely of bourbon. It's mostly chocolate. Also some nuts. And gobs of sugar and butter.
Solies: Will I be okay to drive home after work?
Emma: Oh, no, I don't think so. You'd better stay here for a couple of days until the bourbon works it's way out of your system.
Solies: (glares) I'm not a big drinker, you know. How much alcohol did you shove into me all unbeknownst to me?
Emma: You could pass a breathalizer test right now.
Solies: Really? It tasted very alcoholy.
Emma: I used 1/2 a cup of bourbon spread across 12 tarts and an approximately 9" pan. That's about 4 shots, of which you...
Solies pulls up a chair and calls Blinky
Solies: (To Blinky) You'll want to see this. Emma is attempting to do math.
Blinky: (heard through the phone) SQUEEEEEEE!
Emma: Now if you assume 16 pieces in the pie, and you subtract the amount I spilled when I was filling the tarts...
Solies: Can we just take it as given that I've had a fraction of a shot?
Emma: Yes, please.
Solies: No more math for you.
Emma: Math is hard.
Blinky: But funny!
Solies: Differential equations.
Takis: Hootie hoo!