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All is Ivan...except bookclub - But here in my heart, I give you the best of my love.

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June 22nd, 2005


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12:56 pm - All is Ivan...except bookclub
WH Smith has stopped shipping to the US.
I still won't buy from Amazon.
Damnit.
Trill suggested thebookplace, and that seems promising. I may also try that Scottish Import store where I bought the first 3, assuming i can find their phone number.
Tire saga: continued
So driving to dinner last night, I notice the car is handling sluggish which I've now become an expert at recognizing as a tire problem.
I stop at the gas station next store to try to fill the tire, but it doesn't seem to have any effect.
lensedsqo and I call hoppie.

Me: Hey babe. I'm having a problem. I think my tire is flat again and it's not inflating. Here are the options as I see them: You can come here and swap cars with me and take mine to NTB while I go to my bookclub, you can meet me at book club and take my car to NTB, or I can just live with it for now and take it to NTB in the morning.
Hoppie: I have my 1-1 in 5 minutes.
Me: Oh. Sorry. Call me when you're done with it and we'll see what the situation is like then.

We start dinner. Hoppie calls back.

Hoppie: I canceled my 1-1 and I'm on my way to you.
Me: Okay. Gives directions.

We finish dinner. We debate our next move. We think about taking the spare tire out. We instead move the car back to the gas station and try adding air again.
Hoppie shows up. I ask if I can take his car. He growls at me and then asks if I'll at least remove the spare tire from the trunk. Fine. Whatever.
He wants me to stand around and watch while he changes my tire.

Me: I have book club in 10 minutes.
Hoppie: At least get me the spare tire.
Me and Janice retrieve the spare tire after some effort.
Me: Now can I borrow your car? I have book club in 5 minutes. Less.
Hoppie: I canceled my 1-1 to help you. I'm not particularly sympathetic.
Me: I didn't ask you to do that. I asked you very specifically to swap cars with me so I could make bookclub on time. If you weren't willing or able to do what I asked, you should have said so on the phone, and I would have proceeded with my other plan.
Hoppie: I didn't have a choice. You can't drive this car.
Me: Watch me. Give me back my keys.
Hoppie: No. Take my car.
Me: Thank you. Do you want me to come by and pick up my car before I take Janice home.
Hoppie: No, you shouldn't be driving on the spare.

Notice how he's clearly not planning to actually fix my problem. Just do enough to get by. So like a man. Argh.
So we have book club.
First we discussed Curse the Dark (which has come up before) Bunny said it was interesting, if uneven book. She feels the author has potential. It reminded Bunny of a mystery series about demon detectives. She never fully realized the plot bunnies, and went back and forth, unable to fully commit to her plots or her character arc. Trying to create the arc and stretch it out the way she did, she seemed to lose track of what the characters were doing or where they were supposed to be.
Andrea brought series of 3 books by Beverly Lewis, The Shunning,The Confession,and The Reckoning., which she found in religious fiction. The books follow a woman in an Amish community, Katie. When she was younger, she was in love with this boy who disappeared at sea. The story starts 4 years later when she's 19-20, and she's about to get married to someone else, even though she doesn't love him. In the attic she finds this pink baby dress which it turns out is hers, and that she was adopted by the Amish. Her natural mother meanwhile is looking for her daughter, and after some conflicts with the Amish over her broken engagement, she goes to live with her mother, who's an heiress.
We digressed a bit to talk about religion in odd places, and Bunny and Andrea recommended a book to me called Members of the Tribe where the author takes tp the road discovering the location of former pocket Jewish communities in the South, and what they've left behind. thecomedian, if you're still reading, this might appeal to you as well. If you're in no hurry, I'll let you know what I think when I pick it up.
Robin brought Dance, but Judy Cuevas. A historical romance set in 1905. The heroine's father used to make her dance to his tune by using his money to manipulate her. She leaves and goes to American to learn film. She goes to France and tries to make her film. She's unable to communicate with with the guy who doesn't understand her. she becomes her own woman and opens her own silent theatre. Interesting man/woman dynamic. Many small incidents happen such as when she learns to drive her car, and eventually the man figures out that she needs to be able to dance to her own tune. The focus is a woman in a man's world doing ground-breaking things. It's the last Judy Cuevas before she changes to Judith Ivory.
Bunny brought Somebody Wonderful by Kate Rothwell. Sweet little book. Set in the 1890s in NY. Hero is an Irish cop who came over from Ireland, he wanted to be a doctor and he reads alot, and takes care of his neighbors, fixes people, and animals. She is rich and she's in disguise and he's set upon by a bunch of toughs. See March.
and Mr. Impossible - see April.
Janice brought Joan Johnston After the Kiss clever, and witty regency period romance. The first half of the book is a clever typical society story. Two sister-in-laws try to set up a matchmaking party and discussing another friend who is rather plainspoken. The heroine is the outspoken one and she is tall, gawky, and very self-conscience about not being the ideal beauty. Her friends set up with the rake of the period. On the way to this two week party, neither of them end of showing up. They end up in a stable about 15 minutes away. The rake is coming with the nieces, and their cat has kittens in the barn. The girl's guardian made improper advances, and she runs away and tries to steal the horse. The guy attacks her, realizes that she's running away to his best friend, her cousin and he feels duty-bound to escort her. They have an adversarial relationship. She's kinda brittle, easily tweaked. The guy and the cousin are in the army (right before Waterloo). The guy comes back and is injured and turns into the beast and the second half follows that thawing beast storyline.
Bunny recommended The Barefoot Brideby the same author who has always written a whole line of cowboy contemporary novels. The first one is particularly good, apparently, though Bunny hasn't read it. Maybe I should pick it up for solies
I brought two, an Amanda Quick, Mischief which involves a discredited girl "Immodest Imogene" who is trying to find a way to punish the man she believed killed her best friend...the friend's husband. Her plan is to involve an archaeological expert to convince him that she has information that will lead to a valuable relic and get the friend's husband's to overextend his finances in an effort to find it, but little does she know that after meeting her, the archaeologist/Count is interested in treasure of an entirely different sort.
The other one, The Seduction is a very sweet regency period romance about a wife who was abandoned by her husband and is being manipulated by her ex-fiance to humiliate her further, and enrich himself in the process. Tangled up in this is our hero, Aldon who is as delightful a hero as they come, tough, but marshmallow sweet.

and the entire car ride to and from, I manage to keep up a steady stream of invectives, because I'm trying to burn off enough steam and aggression to be sweet and contrite by the time I get home.
I get home and as I pull into the garage, I realize what hoppie has known for hours. I have no way to get into the house. I gave hoppie my keys. And while he has two key rings, one for car keys and one for house keys, I don't. I only have one, which has both. So I decide I'm going to go to the front door, but I'm going to take my garage door opener from my car, so I don't have to go back into the basement to close the door. I exit the car and go to the console to close his garage and open mine when I realize the door is open. Well, that small and simple act actually did melt most of my aggression. It was so thoughtful and sweet.
I go upstairs and thank him kindly.

He explains to me that he didn't have any choice, I couldn't drive on the car as it was. It wasn't safe. And I could have waited for him, it only took 15 minutes to change the tire.
Me: Not losing temper. Not loosing temper.
Him: Belabouring the point.
Me: You could have done what I wanted, you know, instead of being a pompous little...argh..not losing temper...
Him: Yeah, good luck with that. I notice you didn't say anything about me not taking the car in.
Me: No, I knew you wouldn't. You're predictable. Well, I'm grateful for what you did.
Him: Good.
Me: Still personally annoyed about what you didn't do though, but doing the girl thing and not talking about.
Him: Good for you, dear.

So I took my car in this morning. They looked at both front tires, by request and resealed one and removed a screw from the other.
So I have two questions:
1. Why is it when guys do something, they expect a ticker-tape parade or something. I don't expect accolades when I pick up new pants for hoppie, or new shoes, or when I take his car in to get the oil changed. I don't make him stand around and watch while I do these things either. Why is it when he does something for me, it's a huge freaking deal? (Yes, I admit, I like a "thank you" but it really stops there.)
2. What is it with guys and half-assed solutions. You really want to help me? Deal with the problem. No stop-gaps, no half-measures, no wimpy little copouts. Just freaking fix it.

Oh, and next bookclub is Tuesday, July 19th.

(3 Represent the voice of the people | Request an audience)

Comments:


[User Picture]
From:tpau
Date:June 22nd, 2005 05:21 pm (UTC)
(Link)
boys hav edifferent brains. the ythink differntly, nd view the world differently. i hav egiven up tryign to udnerstand, andnow only try to remember
[User Picture]
From:lena_a_mermaid
Date:June 22nd, 2005 05:51 pm (UTC)
(Link)
Same reason why mothers take care of their own children and some (not all) fathers "babysit" their own children. Grrr! I'm on your side.
[User Picture]
From:cassie_o
Date:June 22nd, 2005 07:16 pm (UTC)
(Link)
BLAH..I feel bad I missed the book club, but it was the whole anniversary thing. I SHOULD be there next month for sure!

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