awesome ultimate expert hen (mdyesowitch) wrote,
awesome ultimate expert hen
mdyesowitch

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Raised in the trees

I think I have to stop going to my high school alumni website. I feel so incredibly, hopelessly under-educated right now. One of the kids I used to kick around with, you know, one of the ones who's always on the other team. Not a bully who I hated or who hated me, but someone who whenever we would play with friends would always end up on the other side, like my buddy The Weed, or Jeff, or, in this case, Charlie. One of the people I used to tease who used to tease me. Not a friend, exactly, but...a boy. One of Ethan's friends. I know I'm saying this all badly, but, he was a friend of a friend. Someone I used to bum around with because I bummed around with his friends sometimes.

Anyway, the point is, he's in Boston. So I though, hey, it would be nice to talk to someone from The Olde Country, maybe I'll give him a buzz. I'm not in touch with any of our mutual friends, or very few, but it might be nice to catch up with him. I am dreadfully homesick and missing Lori so much these days. So I click on the website he lists. It's an archeological research project. He heads the project. He has a doctorate in anthropology. He doesn't live in Boston so much as he teaches at Brandeis. Why would he want to talk to me? I feel like I should bury myself in my own stupid.

Lori says (just so you get another perspective) that the choices we make reflect who we are, not how much better than anyone else we think we are. And yes, Charlie might have changed, but he's still essentially Charlie. She asked me how I thought she felt when she made that call all those years ago, as a fresh graduate, moving to Boston. Moving to a city where she knew very few people and reaching out to a high school buddy who was established in the workforce, had a steady boyfriend and seemed so far beyond the girl she grew up with. Maybe she's right. Maybe I should email him. Then it's his decision whether he wants to see me or not.

I wonder if he still goes by "Charlie."
Tags: friends, thoughts
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