Last night features some particularly odd dreams, and I don't say that lightly.
The first two or three dreams, involved me being at Rocker's house and I met the man I really fell in love with all those years ago, and it wasn't hoppie. I had mistaking him for someone else. This other person who's ircnick was "Darling Doogie" (which doesn't even make sense as an ircnick for so many reasons, but it's an obvious self-reference, so psychologically, it's sorta interesting) was there and I realized it was him I'd fallen for all those years ago. I'd met him and hoppie at the same time, but somehow they got all jumbled up in my head and I thought they were the same person or I'd attributed my conversations with "Doogie" to "Hoppie." Dream me was a bit upset by this, but of course, the second I saw "Doogie" I'd realized what had happened, but it was so long ago? I mean, Hoppie and I have spent the last 12 or so years together and where was this guy when all that was going on.
We were swimming in the pool at Rockers and he said, "I just want to know. I thought we were in love, and the next thing I hear, you're with Hoppie."
And I say, "Well, I don't really want to answer that because it makes me sound stupid, but it was a mistake. I thought he was you." And it explains all those things I thought wrong about hoppie like that he lived in Boston, and I had like this long list of "things I got wrong about hoppie because they were really about doogie" But after all these years, what different does it make. I'm committed to hoppie now and I love him.
And then the second dream involved me telling hoppie, who was pretty indifferent to my suffering. I thought he'd be more upset, but, as dream hoppie pointed out, whether I love the real him or my concept of him when I started out, certainly enough time has passed now that there's no illusion around who he is, and if I love him now, what difference does it make if I only thought I loved him when we started the relationship.
The other dreams involved cellphones and synagogues and they were all very confusing. I don't really get them, but I do want to one set of details down in case it becomes interesting at some point.
I was at KI with Judy and Mark for some type of event, wedding, Bar Mitzvah, something. I was very uncomfortable. At some point, I went outside to make a phone call, to hoppie, I think. I went out the front lawn and was standing near the stained glass windows looking in my purse for my phone. It wasn't inside a possible location (although not the usual one), but I found it clipped to the outside of that pocket. Then I checked the pocket it was supposed to be in and there was another cellphone, a very thin brown one. I had never seen it before. I pressed 1 on the speed dial, which is usually set to call voicemail, and it called someone. I asked if they knew who's phone it was, and they didn't either. So I hung up, and looked around for a second, trying to figure out whose it was and how I got it.
Then someone came up to me and said, "Hey, isn't that X's phone?"
"Is it?" I asked.
"Yeah, I think so. Want me to take it to him?"
"How do I know you won't steal it?"
He laughed and explained to me all the rigours involved in stealing someone's phone. "Easier to return it." he concluded.
I don't remember what happened after that.
Another dream, I remember showing my dad how to get from "Gate 21" to baggage claim since it was outside the airport, not through the terminal. (I have no idea where this was supposed to be.)
And another dream I was talking on the phone to an old Rabbi friend of mine. It was really just chit-chat, nothing serious. I remember asking about his daughter, but apparently she's not in Boston anymore (according to the dream version of the Rabbi.)
Eventually, I woke up. And yes, before you ask, I was tired.