My journal is called "The Difference between a Cow and a Bean" because: (you know the only reason I'm doing this is so I can finally explain). The difference between a cow and a bean (according to Stephen Sondheim's Jack who sold a cow for some magic beans) is that a bean can begin an adventure. I don't know if my live journal can begin an adventure. But I like to think it has. So there.
My subtitle is "NULL" because: really, what else is there to say?
My friends page is called "In blackest day, in blackest night, no evil shall escape my sight" because: anything that gives Green Lantern his powers is cool, and let's face it, I do use my friends page to monitor teh ebil in the world.
My username is "mdyesowitch" because: very salient question. It seemed like the right thing to do at the time. I haven't gotten used to my married name (and I never will at this rate) and I've gotten very used to typing mdyesowitch. (I just spent a few seconds trying to type mdyhopkins and I couldn't do it correctly the first four times. This confirms the choice.)
And I'm going to add this one, because I feel like giving props to my mollybird.
My real name is "Studly piece of buttered cornbread" because: It's my favorite of the silly nicknames she gave me and I realized after I started bashing work, I didn't really want this to be the first link for a google search of my name. Plausable deniablity. Also, I like buttered cornbread. Also I like studliness. Also I like my mollybird. Also I like pieces. Especially when there are 8 of them. Okay that was a terrible joke. I'm shut off now.